I promised myself before this summer began that I was going to be an intern in a way that would leave me exhausted at the end of twelve weeks, and I've done it. Now I am running on caffeine, adrenaline, excitement, and sadness, without much sleep mixed in. My final presentation has been given, my research report submitted, and my internship is over.
I am sad, because I am leaving behind a very unique time in my life that I will never get back again. I am leaving a place that I've come to know well, and friendships that had really only just begun. But I'm happy, too, because tomorrow I get to see my home for the first time in six months. For two and a half weeks I don't have papers to submit and I get to spend time with my family, and it will be a relief to be back in Michigan to rest and have a break before school starts up again.
I will miss Suffolk, but it's time for the next thing. Hello, senior year.
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Miscellany
Oh, the things you have missed in the past two weeks!
1. The Pork, Peanut, and Pine Festival.
Several weeks ago on my solo drive to Richmond, I encountered, in the middle of a Virginia peanut field, a sign advertising said festival, and I decided then and there that I would attend. On Saturday the day came, and I drove an hour into the wilderness of Surry in a thunderstorm because I said I would. By the time I arrived, it was raining so hard I couldn't see, but droves of hardy Virginians were still trucking on through the mud to Chippokes Plantation State Park, so I followed. I marveled that such a huge festival, complete with tractor pull, barbecue cookoff, bluegrass bands, baby piglets, tours of the plantation house, and booth after booth of folks selling everything from little pig earrings (I bought some) to peanut pie (yeah, bought some of that, too) could have sprung up in the middle of nowhere like that. Nobody really seemed to mind that the park looked like it was about to be washed into the James River, so I pretended that I didn't notice, either, and milled about for a couple of hours until the storm got so bad that some official-looking men started telling everyone to pack up and get out. I had given up on my sandals long before because I kept getting stuck in the mud, and then I got my truck stuck and this huge man had to help me push it out, and then I went the wrong way on a one-way exit street and was told to turn around. And then I drove home.
2. A borrowed canoe.
Becca, one of the Dorschels' married daughters, has a canoe. She lives on a small lake in a neighborhood next to mine, and told me recently that I could borrow the canoe whenever I wanted to, so I have. That's the end of that story. But I have really enjoyed it, is the point. I have gone out several times hoping that a train would go over the bridge over the river just as I was paddling under, and on Sunday, IT HAPPENED. That's probably one of those things you're supposed to never do, in case the train careens off the bridge or throws rocks at you or something. But I just floated there grinning and admiring the graffiti.
3. A flock of admirers.
Per usual. I have a love note I got with my receipt from a waiter at Applebee's (complete with name and number) and there is a trail of broken hearts at the Salvation Army, if you listen to the things the old men say there.
4. The last research week!
That's right, folks. Except for tying up a few loose ends here and there, the only thing left on the table is to prepare for my presentation, which I will be giving on Saturday. The closer it gets, the less nervous I become. I'm just looking forward to finally being able to report on what I've been researching and be DONE! I've been studying Suffolk and disability for six months, and that's how long it's been since I've been home. It's time for a break!
If you're praying for me, please pray for peace and calmness and that I would say something helpful at my presentation on Saturday morning. Pray that I would have the strength to finish well. Thank you!
1. The Pork, Peanut, and Pine Festival.
Several weeks ago on my solo drive to Richmond, I encountered, in the middle of a Virginia peanut field, a sign advertising said festival, and I decided then and there that I would attend. On Saturday the day came, and I drove an hour into the wilderness of Surry in a thunderstorm because I said I would. By the time I arrived, it was raining so hard I couldn't see, but droves of hardy Virginians were still trucking on through the mud to Chippokes Plantation State Park, so I followed. I marveled that such a huge festival, complete with tractor pull, barbecue cookoff, bluegrass bands, baby piglets, tours of the plantation house, and booth after booth of folks selling everything from little pig earrings (I bought some) to peanut pie (yeah, bought some of that, too) could have sprung up in the middle of nowhere like that. Nobody really seemed to mind that the park looked like it was about to be washed into the James River, so I pretended that I didn't notice, either, and milled about for a couple of hours until the storm got so bad that some official-looking men started telling everyone to pack up and get out. I had given up on my sandals long before because I kept getting stuck in the mud, and then I got my truck stuck and this huge man had to help me push it out, and then I went the wrong way on a one-way exit street and was told to turn around. And then I drove home.
2. A borrowed canoe.
Becca, one of the Dorschels' married daughters, has a canoe. She lives on a small lake in a neighborhood next to mine, and told me recently that I could borrow the canoe whenever I wanted to, so I have. That's the end of that story. But I have really enjoyed it, is the point. I have gone out several times hoping that a train would go over the bridge over the river just as I was paddling under, and on Sunday, IT HAPPENED. That's probably one of those things you're supposed to never do, in case the train careens off the bridge or throws rocks at you or something. But I just floated there grinning and admiring the graffiti.
3. A flock of admirers.
Per usual. I have a love note I got with my receipt from a waiter at Applebee's (complete with name and number) and there is a trail of broken hearts at the Salvation Army, if you listen to the things the old men say there.
4. The last research week!
That's right, folks. Except for tying up a few loose ends here and there, the only thing left on the table is to prepare for my presentation, which I will be giving on Saturday. The closer it gets, the less nervous I become. I'm just looking forward to finally being able to report on what I've been researching and be DONE! I've been studying Suffolk and disability for six months, and that's how long it's been since I've been home. It's time for a break!
If you're praying for me, please pray for peace and calmness and that I would say something helpful at my presentation on Saturday morning. Pray that I would have the strength to finish well. Thank you!
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Bests and Worsts
With just three and a half weeks left until my plane flies out of Newport News to Detroit, I feel that I'm at a point where I can offer an honest overview of my internship. I can finally adequately address the simple question, "So, how is your internship going?"
I'll start with the best part. This internship has been encouraging and affirming beyond anything I expected. I majored in community development as kind of a last-ditch effort, convinced that God was calling me in some way to assist the church in helping the poor, but my failed attempts in the past had left me equally certain that I was not the person for the job. My first economics class at Covenant scared me so much that I came very close to ditching the whole thing again. I was an unofficial English major for half of sophomore year.
This internship has repeatedly affirmed not only that I am called to church based community development and that this is what I want to give my life to, but that I am actually equipped to do it. I am doing some good research. Working at the church just feels right. And the things I've learned in the classroom over the past three years are connecting, making me realize what a fantastic foundation I have to enter this field. Equally importantly, Westminster has showed me that church based community development can be done well, when I was beginning to doubt that it was possible. I am so blessed to be here at this time to get to watch how these brothers and sisters wrestle and succeed.
The worst part has been loneliness. Hands down. I did not expect to struggle so much with feeling homesick and isolated. At times it has been crippling. This is the first time I've ever been somewhere where I didn't know a soul before arriving, and it can be difficult to connect with people in a real way when they know and you know that you're only temporary in their lives. This is just one of the ways I am finding that God is showing me my weaknesses in much louder terms than usual, and as hard as that can be, I am thankful for it when I stop and consider. As he provides for me daily he is showing me yet again that he is my strength. He is also forcing me to learn to deal with myself on a deeper level than I have ever had to before. Honestly, I'd rather know now what some of my biggest issues are going to be as a CDV practitioner than be shocked by them further down the road. Plus, I've done some creative things to manage my loneliness that I might have missed out on otherwise, like driving by myself to an art festival in Richmond on Friday night, attending a two-and-a-half hour long service at a black Baptist church downtown with Sister, asking an older lady at church if I could spend some time with her and getting invited to a tea room for lunch, and getting the youth intern to teach me how to drive a stick shift.
The short answer to "How is your internship going?" is this: I am uplifted and I am lonely. God is giving me exactly what I need!
I'll start with the best part. This internship has been encouraging and affirming beyond anything I expected. I majored in community development as kind of a last-ditch effort, convinced that God was calling me in some way to assist the church in helping the poor, but my failed attempts in the past had left me equally certain that I was not the person for the job. My first economics class at Covenant scared me so much that I came very close to ditching the whole thing again. I was an unofficial English major for half of sophomore year.
This internship has repeatedly affirmed not only that I am called to church based community development and that this is what I want to give my life to, but that I am actually equipped to do it. I am doing some good research. Working at the church just feels right. And the things I've learned in the classroom over the past three years are connecting, making me realize what a fantastic foundation I have to enter this field. Equally importantly, Westminster has showed me that church based community development can be done well, when I was beginning to doubt that it was possible. I am so blessed to be here at this time to get to watch how these brothers and sisters wrestle and succeed.
The worst part has been loneliness. Hands down. I did not expect to struggle so much with feeling homesick and isolated. At times it has been crippling. This is the first time I've ever been somewhere where I didn't know a soul before arriving, and it can be difficult to connect with people in a real way when they know and you know that you're only temporary in their lives. This is just one of the ways I am finding that God is showing me my weaknesses in much louder terms than usual, and as hard as that can be, I am thankful for it when I stop and consider. As he provides for me daily he is showing me yet again that he is my strength. He is also forcing me to learn to deal with myself on a deeper level than I have ever had to before. Honestly, I'd rather know now what some of my biggest issues are going to be as a CDV practitioner than be shocked by them further down the road. Plus, I've done some creative things to manage my loneliness that I might have missed out on otherwise, like driving by myself to an art festival in Richmond on Friday night, attending a two-and-a-half hour long service at a black Baptist church downtown with Sister, asking an older lady at church if I could spend some time with her and getting invited to a tea room for lunch, and getting the youth intern to teach me how to drive a stick shift.
The short answer to "How is your internship going?" is this: I am uplifted and I am lonely. God is giving me exactly what I need!
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Here are some pictures.
Just my three favorites.
1) Before the Decade Dance. That's me on the right, rocking Emma's sweet tie-dye shirt.
2) Me and Jenn at the Decade Dance, which was in the Great Hall. Weird. And what's with that guy behind me?!
3) Our group by the Overlook.
1) Before the Decade Dance. That's me on the right, rocking Emma's sweet tie-dye shirt.
2) Me and Jenn at the Decade Dance, which was in the Great Hall. Weird. And what's with that guy behind me?!
3) Our group by the Overlook.
Carly Rae Jepsen, don't you EVER call me!
I spent most of last week at The Edge conference with Westminster's junior high youth group, and let me tell you-- there is nothing like a van full of 13-year-old girls to ruin a taste for Top 40. Even so, I am thrilled that I went. I could write down everything that happened, but you wouldn't want to read that, so I'll just share some of the highlights.
- Old friends. The conference was held at Covenant and I didn't tell anyone I was coming, so I got to surprise Hannah, Damarise, Leah, and even my brother, who was in Chattanooga for a different youth trip. Jonas was so shocked he slammed me into a tree. Ah, brother love!
- New friends. I attended my first youth group meeting at the beginning of my internship because I wanted to do something that frightened me, and kids are it. I am so glad I kept going back! I have rarely enjoyed a weekend so much, and I had a blast with this group of people, kids and leaders alike. Knowing them is going to make it a lot harder to leave in a few weeks.
- Encouraging conversations. There were a lot of those this week. I was refreshed in my faith far more than I expected to be, and every day brought someone else who either told me exactly what I needed to hear, or needed to hear something I had to say.
- Activities geared toward junior high students. I love the high energy and lack of dignity present in most middle schoolers. The Decade Dance and Water Fest were such a blast, and included all of my favorite elements for a good activity: at the Decade Dance, I got to poof my hair up and dance like a lunatic, and since I'm in college I am automatically cool, so I even got respect for looking like an idiot. Water Fest ended in being covered head to toe in mud and Vaseline and getting sprayed off with a fire hose. I couldn't have been more delighted.
- Sitting in a van for eighteen hours. This was, unfortunately, the Year of the Crisis for the group, so we wound up being on the road for about a year and got home at 4 a.m. on Thursday. Oddly, this drive falls into my "fond memories" list as well. There's something about a miserably long drive that bonds people together, especially when you're so tired all you can do is laugh.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Mismatched buttons and peanut butter
You know those days that you can't quite complain about but just feel a little bit… off? Like wearing a shirt with the top button accidentally looped through the second button hole. Nothing quite works the way it's supposed to and you're never sure what's going on. You can't decide if you ought to be bothered by it or just laugh instead.
That's how yesterday was. I led my first-ever focus group in the morning, after carefully grooming my questions over the weekend to be sure I was fully prepared. I was expecting about six or seven of our regular participants to show up. By nine o'clock, all of the regulars were in the room chatting boisterously and drinking coffee, and by the time I abandoned ship at ten, there were sixteen people in the room, including a cute little girl with braids and a very serious-looking baby who wished he could climb across the table. The most ridiculous thing about this situation was that half of these people I had never seen before and no one had invited them. I don't know where they came from! My professors at Covenant would have been thrilled to peek into the office yesterday morning and see me trying to conduct "sensible and helpful" research in an environment that was in exact opposition to my purposes. It didn't go terribly, and I actually thought it was quite funny, but there were far too many people and too much chaos for me to do really ideal research.
By the time I left work I still felt rather thrown by the focus group and by managing things on my own all day, with Hayden gone in San Francisco. I clambered into my truck and was about to start it, only to realize that I had somehow got peanut butter in the ignition. What?! This struck me as impossibly funny and I laughed mindlessly on the steering wheel for a couple of minutes. If anyone saw me it probably looked like I was weeping.
In an attempt to make sense of a very strange day, I did something completely irrational: I drove half an hour just to find ice cream. Suffolk's only very serious fault is that it doesn't have a single place to buy an ice cream sundae within half an hour of downtown. For a place that already reached ninety degrees in May, this seems completely unreasonable to me. My own homeland still struggles with the 50s in that month, and there are like four good places for me to buy a cone within walking distance of my house. Anyway, yesterday was the final straw. I was not going to put up with an icecreamless existence anymore. So I chucked research for the rest of the day and drove out to Sweet Frog for a sundae (Sweet Frog is actually frozen yogurt, so healthy, and Christian-run, so spiritual. Boom! I win!). Afterward I went to the gym and ran until I wanted to die. Yeah, all of my choices yesterday made a ton of sense, too.
But the ice cream and the run made me feel better. Can't wait to see what the rest of this week holds...
That's how yesterday was. I led my first-ever focus group in the morning, after carefully grooming my questions over the weekend to be sure I was fully prepared. I was expecting about six or seven of our regular participants to show up. By nine o'clock, all of the regulars were in the room chatting boisterously and drinking coffee, and by the time I abandoned ship at ten, there were sixteen people in the room, including a cute little girl with braids and a very serious-looking baby who wished he could climb across the table. The most ridiculous thing about this situation was that half of these people I had never seen before and no one had invited them. I don't know where they came from! My professors at Covenant would have been thrilled to peek into the office yesterday morning and see me trying to conduct "sensible and helpful" research in an environment that was in exact opposition to my purposes. It didn't go terribly, and I actually thought it was quite funny, but there were far too many people and too much chaos for me to do really ideal research.
By the time I left work I still felt rather thrown by the focus group and by managing things on my own all day, with Hayden gone in San Francisco. I clambered into my truck and was about to start it, only to realize that I had somehow got peanut butter in the ignition. What?! This struck me as impossibly funny and I laughed mindlessly on the steering wheel for a couple of minutes. If anyone saw me it probably looked like I was weeping.
In an attempt to make sense of a very strange day, I did something completely irrational: I drove half an hour just to find ice cream. Suffolk's only very serious fault is that it doesn't have a single place to buy an ice cream sundae within half an hour of downtown. For a place that already reached ninety degrees in May, this seems completely unreasonable to me. My own homeland still struggles with the 50s in that month, and there are like four good places for me to buy a cone within walking distance of my house. Anyway, yesterday was the final straw. I was not going to put up with an icecreamless existence anymore. So I chucked research for the rest of the day and drove out to Sweet Frog for a sundae (Sweet Frog is actually frozen yogurt, so healthy, and Christian-run, so spiritual. Boom! I win!). Afterward I went to the gym and ran until I wanted to die. Yeah, all of my choices yesterday made a ton of sense, too.
But the ice cream and the run made me feel better. Can't wait to see what the rest of this week holds...
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Somethin' Bout a Truck...
Yeah, I know every word to that song.
And here I am with the trusty pickup. You can't tell from this picture, but it has super cool camouflage detailing around the windows and hood, and hunting stickers on the windows.
I am pleased to find that I actually look somewhat capable standing next to it, and not as little and comical as I had feared.
And here I am with the trusty pickup. You can't tell from this picture, but it has super cool camouflage detailing around the windows and hood, and hunting stickers on the windows.
I am pleased to find that I actually look somewhat capable standing next to it, and not as little and comical as I had feared.
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